11 Mistakes You Make When Life Doesn't Go As Planned

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Every person’s worst nightmare is when his plans don’t end up as he expected. There’s nothing more frustrating than going against all odds to risk your resources and pride for your dreams but not meeting the desired outcome. Aside from feeling disappointed in yourself, you would feel stupid and pathetic for going through all that trouble only to go back from scratch, or worse, move the finish line farther away.

Your ego is hurt because your sincere efforts are put to waste, and you don’t want anybody to know you failed. You start keeping your adversity as a secret to protect your reputation, and this is one of the reasons you won’t grow. Clouds of negative thought hover over the little hope and then you start taking in the doubts to break you even harder. Little do you know, you start believing all these other voices and thinking maybe you’re a fool for chasing after your dream.

You would dare to throw away all you’ve put in because of a minor mishap. Don’t be that kind of person weak enough to get back up again when pulled down; you’ll be eaten alive in the world. While you’re wrong, learn to be resilient and optimistic with every obstacle by telling yourself you will get past this with faith and strategy.

Life will never go as planned because we never know what happens in the future. The moment you accept that the only thing constant in the world is change, the sooner you realize your problems are smaller than you think. This is a skill that has been practiced by successful entrepreneurs every day of their lives, and they live to risk all that they have for their dreams. Otherwise, there wouldn’t be a single one of them today. 






It’s foolish to think having a plan is futile when it’s what keeps you on your feet. Every single day you’re granted 24 hours to do what you want, and without a plan, you’ll waste every minute of your life until it’s too late. And when the time comes that you’re too incapacitated to move, you’ll have lost a life filled with wonder and exploration. You need to plan not only to become efficient with your time and energy but also to be ready for unforeseen circumstances that may require you to opt for Plan B.

The truth is, a plan doesn’t guarantee a clear outcome but it doesn’t make it any less important. What it can do, however, is to maximize a positive result and mitigate a negative one. It’s good to embrace spontaneity every once in a while, but never stop planning clear, time-bound objectives for your long-term goals.




When your plans don’t fall through, it doesn’t mean your dream is going down the drain as well. As they say, there are many ways to skin a cat. The possibilities are endless if you know where to look and have the guts to push through. Many weak-minded people quit dreaming when they failed at their first try, and that is because they don’t have the determination to back up their minds with action. They only want to brag about their dream to the same losers around them because losers are the only people they could fool.

No successful person ever said chasing your dream was easy, but they’ve always said you will become what you put your mind into despite the forces that pull you underneath. Don’t give up on your dreams when you’ve lost because you owe it to yourself to carry on. There’s a reason God gave you the talent and the passion to move mountains, and that’s because He knows you can surpass anything.




Blaming yourself for the setbacks that you have nothing to do with doesn’t only delay you from actually looking for a solution but also undermines the trust you have in yourself. On the flipside, passing on the blame to other people will not help as well as it will only create confusion and chaos. Even if they are responsible for the actions that directly affected you, the damage has already been done. There’s no point to keep dwelling on it and making people feel bad about it over and over again. What you should do is take the accountability that you’re responsible for the situation you’re in as well and make your remaining time count.




An example of wasting time is to keep insisting that the original plan was better and refusing to consider other options. Obviously, your pride is failing to understand that you were wrong and that you have to find another way. Ambitious narcissists have the audacity to get angry at people who look for alternatives to solve the problem at hand because their ideas were left out. They’re willing to sabotage and risk the life of their dreams to prove a point. Instead of forcing the situation to turn in your favor, accept that your ideas are either irrelevant, ineffective, or unsuited for the problem. We all make mistakes and there’s no shame in admitting you were not the right person to look for a solution.




Don’t taint the vision of your future depending on the situation you’re in temporarily. Just because you had a few losses, that doesn’t necessarily mean your business will suffer the same fate in the future. Just because you didn’t make the smart business choice today, that doesn’t mean you won’t be able to negotiate better in the next years to come. Don’t maim your self-esteem out of spite because you think that’s what you deserve. All of us go through tough circumstances and life’s unpredictability will teach you that anything can happen. One day, thinking and being negative just because you’re hurt shouldn’t be a reason to stop moving. Once you continue to move forward, you’ll see the light at the end of the tunnel eventually.




Being desperate to get back on track right away can lead to poor choices because you’ll confuse motion with progress. In your mind, you think that as long as you’re doing something instead of being idle, you will get back into momentum before you know it (even when they are wrong choices). Wrong choices like these will either delay your progress or destroy the chance of you achieving your dream forever. Don’t go back to the bad place you once were in just because you didn’t make it to the next place. When you’re desperate, every move you see, you consider an opportunity. Never let people break down the tower you’ve to build just because you’ve misplaced a couple of bricks. 




It’s one thing to train yourself to become independent amidst adversity and it’s another to deceive yourself that you don’t need anybody’s help because of your ego standing in the way. Refusing to accept help from someone who’s giving it out of the goodness of his heart is not only rejecting grace but also a fatal mistake in your career. You don’t have to accept financial help if you don’t find it appropriate but simple help like advice and connections can go a long way. Taking help does not mean you’re weak. It manifests how good of a friend you are, that now you are in your lowest time, someone is willing to go the extra mile for you.




It’s time to stop telling yourself that you’re a failure when you encounter a few problems. You’re only a failure when you have no plan, no hope, no desire to come back and get up. As long as you still have the will to move forward no matter how slow the process is going to be, you are not a failure. Telling yourself you’re something you’re not will only convince your mind to be the image you paint yourself to be. More importantly, don’t let anybody let you feel lesser than what you are. Life is already tough as it is, don’t make it even harder by letting insecure dreamers beat you to achieving yours.




This has to be one of the biggest mistakes you’ll ever make. Having  It’s not easy to get out of that zone that traps you. It’s not easy to pull yourself out of the darkness; getting back inside to the dark corners of your mind is like going back to the same person who hurt you. Never give in to the people who spread hate and negativity towards you especially if you’re in a low state of mind. It may be so tempting to believe when they say you’re not meant to achieve your dreams when it looks so far-fetched, but never give them the satisfaction of breaking down. If you will, you won’t know that someday, you may not be able to leave. And when you realize there’s a light at the end of the tunnel, you’ll run out of time. 




One way to disregard the value of your mistakes is to repeat them. Ignoring your mistakes may not seem intentional but it is. You’re preventing yourself from expanding your creativity because you don’t want to risk it again. If you really don’t want history to repeat itself in terms of your adversities, then make a conscious effort to avoid getting into a position where you have to make that mistake again. Develop new, effective habits while starting small so you can replace the old, good-for-nothing daily practices. Avoid peers who got you into that mess in the first place. 




Dreamers are tough but good-natured because they’ve been through so many ordeals but they know they can never get through by having a negative attitude. You need to be wise and critical about the people you’re involved in so you’ll know their intentions and not be fooled. You weren’t scared when you pursued your dream with a plan before, so you don’t have to be scared now. Just because it didn’t work out before, doesn’t mean you couldn’t do something else. You can either change the means or change the goal; this is a dilemma you have to be asking yourself every time. 




It’s disappointing to get slapped in the face by the reality that you have to be responsible with your life when the truth is, you’re never going to have the full control. It’s like playing poker with life except there are no secret tricks you can learn to outsmart your opponent. In a negative mindset, it’s always you versus the world, but it doesn’t have to be that way. You take control by becoming self-aware of how often you meet shortcomings and what you usually do to respond to them.

This way, you’ll be able to adjust what factors in your personality need improvement on especially when it’s under the heat of the moment. Even when you can’t guarantee what life throws at you, what you can guarantee is how you face each one of them with a grin on your face that can’t be erased. Be open-minded and the same cautious with your actions so that when you fall, you won’t fall deep enough. Have faith in God who will help you in every step of the way, for He alone holds complete control over your life.



“We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, to have the life that is waiting for us.”

E. M. Forster 

Published by Monique Renegado

Monique started Life Begins At Twenty as a 20-year-old college student from the Philippines. In her lifestyle and wellness blog, she shares first-hand experiences and soulful advice about student life, relationships, mental health, adulting, and self-growth. Monique is passionate about literature, music, public speaking, and family. Besides studying and blogging full-time, she strives hard to become a published author with her first YA fiction novel and poems. Monique is the older sister you wish you had to help you navigate your twenties successfully. If you want a constant drive for motivation and pep talks, be a part of her journey.

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